Dear Presidential Candidates,

March 25, 2008 at 3:06 pm Leave a comment

Dear Hillary Clinton:

Why do you have to be president AGAIN?! Haven’t you already been president for eight years? Why do you wanna do it again? Go away!

Also, concerning your little “I was shot at by snipers in Bosnia” comment that turned out to be a big fat lie: You recently said that you “misspoke,” and that you couldn’t keep up with everything that you’ve said. NEWSFLASH! YOU DON’T HAVE TO KEEP UP WITH EVERYTHING YOU SAY IF YOU DON’T LIE, YOU STUPID DUMBASS!

Please go away and get the hell off of my television.

Sincerely,

Kegger

Dear Barak Obama:

I’m beginning to think that you’re as full of crap as Hillary. I have a big problem with you going to a church that preaches hate for 20 years. I mean, I can understand you visiting a few times to see if you like it, but if it’s teaching hate, I’m just not okay with the fact that you went there for 20 years and now you want to be president of our country. You can’t tell me that you don’t at least partially agree with your former pastor, especially when you’ve called him your “mentor” more than once. I think I would like you to go away, too. Please get the hell off of my television.

Sincerely,

Kegger

Dear John McCain:

I don’t care if you were a POW in Vietnam. Why does that make you more qualified to run our country? Haven’t you run for president enough times unsuccessfully to realize that no one REALLY wants you to be president? Please go away and get the hell off of my television.

Sincerely,

Kegger

Dear Ralph Nadar:

Seriously, why are you even bothering?

Sincerely,

Kegger

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Entry filed under: Letters, Rant. Tags: .

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